Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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