Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
