Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
