Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
