I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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