just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
