I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
