Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
