i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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