i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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