Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
