He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Randomize
