I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
