is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Randomize
