That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
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