I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
either way he was missing a nipple.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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