He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
