Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
