He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
