Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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