Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize