i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Go christen that room with your naked body.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize