is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize