your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
