Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Randomize
