I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
