i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
