there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
