Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
