I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
