I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
