Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
