ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
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she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
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