Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
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