Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize