Texts From Last Night

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  (407): View more from Florida

  I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"

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  (407): I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt" http://tfl.nu/48bw
  Replies (14) Good night (3356) Bad night (988)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.

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  (330): The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops. http://tfl.nu/2l9n
  Replies (11) Good night (4772) Bad night (1262)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome

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  (708): I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome http://tfl.nu/0ypv
  Replies (11) Good night (1776) Bad night (4195)
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  (+30): View more from

  Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi

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  (+30): Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi http://tfl.nu/acnu
  Replies (13) Good night (6267) Bad night (1311)
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  (772): View more from Florida

  I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"

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  (772): I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up" http://tfl.nu/z0ws
  Replies (12) Good night (2252) Bad night (949)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.

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  (903): Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication. http://tfl.nu/g1e0
  Replies (18) Good night (2364) Bad night (1306)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night

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  (785): Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night http://tfl.nu/utdq
  Replies (1) Good night (2315) Bad night (909)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back

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  (301): people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back http://tfl.nu/aa8w
  Replies (3) Good night (732) Bad night (1280)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka

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  (817): Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka http://tfl.nu/xkay
  Replies (9) Good night (661) Bad night (1318)
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  (925): View more from California

  You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.

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  (925): You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink. http://tfl.nu/daan
  Replies (5) Good night (932) Bad night (500)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.

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  (307): Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex. http://tfl.nu/mrat
  Replies (7) Good night (1942) Bad night (586)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?

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  (732): You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean? http://tfl.nu/m097
  Replies (2) Good night (834) Bad night (393)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.

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  (801): I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck. http://tfl.nu/p42i
  Replies (2) Good night (991) Bad night (399)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?

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  (440): This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina? http://tfl.nu/kffk
  Replies (9) Good night (1020) Bad night (666)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.

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  (647): I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes. http://tfl.nu/g99k
  Replies (4) Good night (395) Bad night (871)

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