Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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