And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
