im about as happy as oj after his trial
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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