4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Randomize
