In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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