ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
