i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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