We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
