So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
if only i could text you this smell
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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