Cold hands, warm shart.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Randomize