I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
