i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Randomize