My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
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