is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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