A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
